the first step to believing we are beloved

“I am unlovable.”

It’s the whisper that feels true, more true than anything else: How can I be loved, right now, like this? How can I be considered “beloved”?

Meet Aliza.


Aliza is 25 years old. Works as a barista. Struggles to believe she has what it takes to make it in a world pushing achievement, salary, perfection. Cutting is her response. Digging into her skin—with anything she can find—the answer to her pain. How can she not try to do something to wake herself up, or do better, or at least inflict self-punishment—for her failing to not deserve love?

God has something to say to her.

Meet Lea.

unlovableLea is 38 years old, not fully healed. Emotionally scarred from being neglected, not being seen by her family when she was a little girl. She left home for a while as a teenager. That’s when the battle in her heart surfaced physically. That’s when the anorexia began. She asks God, “Why can’t I be seen?” She fears she is not worth enough to be loved.

God has something to say to her.


Meet Bella.

unlovableBella, 16 years old, scrutinizes her appearance, her personality. She decides she isn’t cool enough, smart enough, witty enough. She studies the covers of magazines, scrolls beautiful Instagram feeds. She looks for her own face there—some conviction that she is worthy, beautiful, desired, interesting, too. She decides joy and freedom is fleeting when she struggles to accept her identity. She fears God can’t possibly like her if she doesn’t even like herself.


God has something to say to her.

There is a piece of us in each of these women—these girls-now-women who struggle to believe they are lovable.

And that’s why God has something to say to each of us, too.

We can be far from believing we are beloved. Yet there is something in us that makes us restless, that gives us a glimpse of hope that these crazy beliefs of ours might not actually be true.

We can still believe, despite our past, our circumstances, that God might have a different way to view our life.

Can we listen? Do we want to hear what He has to say?

Come closer. Let’s lean in, listening to heart of our Father.

Our story is here, written in his eyes, his hands.

Come, Lord. You have begun the conversation. Help us enter in.

Sister, listen close.


How do you long to believe you are God’s beloved? What do you most hope God would say to you right now?

Do you want to join me–participate in 40 conversations God has with 40 different women? Do you want to join me in discovering our own story here, learning what God has to say to our hearts? Click here.

There are some awesome gifts for you, too

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  • I can’t buy this book right now maybe in a few months. But thank you for the encouragement. I also need to find my way in to this. Still struggling a lot with this thoughtstylish specially that the father of my son and baby girl have left us now a year ago after 10 years. Still don’t understanding why. But life goes on. En the Lord knowse it. So that releaves a bit the pain. Blessing

  • Dear Jean,

    I am so sorry. This is not too big for Him. Praying now for you to feel His arms around you–His peace and hope and joy, in the midst of this sorrow and pain. I will continue to pray in Jesus’ name.

  • Thanks for sending peices of the stories. I know many people will be blessed by this book. I’m so glad God led me to find your sight. Though I am week God is working in my life to bring me peace.

  • Thank you so much for sharing, for this book, for its truth…it is on its way to me now & I can’t wait to receive it and read 🙂
    My Anorexia manifested at 11 years of age and I came to my most severe at age 25, battled for life for the 10 years following and now, at 44, have finally regained health, yet my heart & mind still struggle to feel beloved or worthy of being beloved…am working on accepting the gifts and truths from God that I know He is waiting to bestow fully and completely on me when I am willing to accept them fully!!

  • I hope that soon I can buy this book in South Africa. Everyday I struggle with the spirit of envy and self image problems that stems for a 2 year fight with anorexia when I was younger. I now have my own daughter and I wish to be a good Godly example to her. Every time I think that I’m going to be okay, I see someone more pretty, skinnier, beautiful hair and I fall… again. How will I ever fight this.